2K Games drops "da (Vinci) bomb!"

As you probably all know, Tom Hanks has been pissing on Catholicism. What you might not know, is that now you can too! With "The Da Vinci Code: The official game of the movie of the book".

We're expecting some excellent feedback from Rome, alongside a 9/10 from Richard and Judy.

In the meantime, please enjoy this in-game screen shot;


Next week: Rockstar's controversial "GTA: Vatican City".

Chris Moyles' face found in Tokyo!

And he's selling some colourful biscuits!

This may well be the scariest thing we've ever found. Ever.

The legacy continues

In keeping with our promise to bring coverage of the continuing development on what was once the heart and soul of Xbox 360 in Japan: 'The 360 Lounge', we made our way back to its gravesite to observe the aftermath of its collapse.

Question 1: What the fuck is this?

We're not the most perceptive of fellows, but to us, that looks a lot like 'not a big white construction site'. We smell something foul at work...

Question 2: No really, what the fuck is it?

It appears to be...another cafe! This isn't the 360 Lounge. Who the hell's in charge here?

Question 3: Are you crying as much as we are?

You see what they did there? The realised that the 360 Lounge just wasn't a permanent business venture so they built this "world cup viewing cafe" instead. Absolutely ingenious.

Stay tuned after World Cup season as we investigate the "August Cafe".

Hoorah.

For those who said "It's not that expensive"

£300 worth of Japanese yen gets you a box of hard drive. We're terrified to imagine what "open price" means. Still if you're after a console worth owning...

(This may be changed at a later date according to whether we have to eat our own words or not)

For those concerned for the 360's future:

Please head here

This is Next-Gen, where they take physics and add their own rules.

God bless Tecmo.

A word from our sponsors:

Comments about Sony's "Wii" coming soon.

Controversial game in game controversey

There was a time when a mod was nothing but a bloke on a scooter supposedly at war with another bloke because they didn't like the same music.

Nowadays, although the word stays the same, the meaning is something much darker, more sinister than anything the 1960s could throw at us. In recent light of mods that allow us to view such horrors as naked children in the Sims, and black people having sex in Grand Theft Auto, Bethesda have provided the middle-class white world with something new to complain about.

Topless women!

Can you imagine that? Women...but without their tops on. They are literally topless. Like you can see their breasts. Their topless naked breasts. The concept scares the willies out of us.

Of course we say Bethesda, but in actual fact it's a group of elite hackers, probably Chinese, who are corrupting our computer screens with this downloadable filth.

Or is it?

As you can see below, this is a screen-shot taken from the "un-modable" Xbox 360 version of The Elderscrolls 4: Oblivion. See if you can spot what's wrong...

Well looky here! I suppose you think two scantily clad women spooning by a log fire is acceptable behaviour to be teaching our children. I suppose this kind of thing is okay is it?

Really Bethesda, sometimes we can't help but think that you're actually all gay.

Yeah, alright, calm down.

I'm going to assume each of those comments on the last post were by different people, and not just one person, called Amelia.

I haven't posted for ages because I've been living in a fantasy world where I don't have any uni work to do, then just the other day I left said fantasy world and realised I've got two weeks to do an entire semester's worth of work. Panic ensued, and has no intention of stopping until the 15th of May. Then I will be in some form of coma for possibly several weeks, if I am not already dead.

Right now I also have a headache because the postman DARED to wake me up this morning by actually delivering some fucking mail for once. Prick.

So, I'm going to fix everything by playing Yoshi's Island on the toilet. Like, whilst I'm sat on it. Pooing. Although knowing my luck there'll probably be a massive fucking spider by the air-vent again.

I hate spiders, and am definitely not afraid of them.

At all.