EXCLUSIVE! Microsoft to enter handheld market!

There's a really funny joke somewhere there about some kind of physical representation of Microsoft somehow entering a tiny little market that just about fits into a pair of human hands.

BUT NO. It wouldn't actually be funny, AND we've got some actual news for once.

It was announced today that Microsoft are finally attempting to conquer the handheld gaming scene, just as easily as they won home console owners' hearts with the incredibly successful 'Ultra Halo 2 Machine'.

"To be honest, we're trying to keep this one fairly low-key", Microsoft's J Allard told us when we had a quick chat with him the other day, because that's the kind of thing we get up to. "The simple fact is, we think it's just too awesome for the general public. Our plan is pretty much to release the Xbox 360 just as a sort of dummy console. We'll then spend a fortune marketing that, while the REAL gamers will go beyond, and discover the Bubble for themselves."

Pretty cunning, Mr Allard. Still, what's so special about the Bubble, eh? Allard wouldn't tell us on the day, but a couple of hours after we spoke to him, we recieved the following picture in a mysterious e-mail. See what you make of it!